things glossed over

When releasing in its platform for the Romeny and Ryan presidential ticket an assault on the liberty of gays and lesbians to get married, the Republican Party in America has proven itself fully ignorant of our founding persons' intent. Since none of our founding persons – not George Washington, Abigail Adams, or Thomas Jefferson – saw fit to speak about gay marriage or to define marriage according to the dustier and more embarrassing sections of the Christian's bible, we can only wonder how the Republicans came up with the fantastical and farcical notion that government should regulate marriage between same-sex individuals but not the amount of pollution emitted by industry.

In the Treaty of Tripoli, George Washington and John Adams wrote: “America was not in any way founded upon the Christian faith,” words that were ratified unanimously by their contemporaries in Congress. Keeping this quote in our minds, we cannot dare to allow the rules of Christianity to become the laws of our land, or stand by as they infect the halls of our secular government with narrow-mindedness and hatred; to do so would reduce us to the level of such murderous tyrants as we struggle to overthrow, the Taliban and al Qaida. Perhaps it is because our troopers by the hundreds of thousands have been battling religious-based terrorism in foreign lands, and that we as a nation have focused most of our attention and a lot of our treasure on making things better for non-American foreigners, that religious-based terrorism is now threatening to take hold of this nation's highest office. Since turning the rules of one religion into the law of the land would subject portions of our population to biblically-justified oppression, theocratic rule is a form of terrorism; if we allow someone such as Mitt Romney to pass a Constitutional amendment defining marriage as between one man and one woman (which is spoken of only in the Christian bible's old testament and not at all mentioned by Jesus), we would establish theocratic rule, thus terrorizing innocent queers and non-combatant fags, neighbors and citizens alike.

It appears to me that the Republicans are banking all their hopes and aspirations on a voting block made up of religiously-conservative, born-again-Christian fringe-types, affluent Caucasians prone to shitting themselves with fear upon seeing men in turbans or drag. I admit that the asses' move was a genius stroke of propaganda, using the term Defense of Marriage to define their assault on the rights of homosexual Americans to marry one another; defense, however, implies that something is being attacked, whereas no one is trying to restrict heterosexuals' ability to get married, merely to grant homosexuals rights equal to those granted to heterosexuals. I have mentioned it before, and far better persons have said it before me, but I believe that we are now in the part of this country's life-cycle where things get worse before they get better; I can hardly imagine something worse than being forced to live by the rules of a religion not of my choosing, to have to kill unruly children (Deuteronomy 12:18-21), to have to kill non-virgin brides (Deuteronomy 22:13-21) – to have to kill anybody, for that matter, in order to satisfy the vain and petty blood-lust of YHWH, the Christians' god. If, friend, you feel the same way, if you would like to control your own life, if you mind your own business and could care less whom other people marry, please say NO to religious rule, fight Mitt Romney's and the Republican Party's plans for religious terrorism in America, and help defend fragile, tender Liberty. Mahalo, then, to you, oh brave and selfless warrior.

場黑麥 mentiri factorem fecit

as dogs do, so shall I do

  A woman is out walking her dog and the beast urinates on the sidewalk ahead of me. I step accidentally in the stream of piss spreading toward the gutter, but instead of reacting angrily I tell myself: The poor beast has to piss somewhere – why not right here in front of me? If the woman had curbed her dog, I would not have stepped in its bowel movement, but since she did not, I must scrape its shit off of the bottom of my shoe.

 I have no problem with the animal doing any of this so long as I might also piss freely into the gutter whenever I want to. As a member of the species homo sapiens and a bowel-moving, food-digesting animal, I shall make water into any nearby gutter if the urge to pee should hit me unexpectedly. Just now, I made water in the street near LAPD headquarters, at two thirty on a Wednesday afternoon, and no persons complained or looked at me funny. (I suspect that people do not confront me because I am tall, and because I look like I could be a mentally insane homeless person.)

  City-dwellers of the world, fight species-based discrimination by curbing yourself and pissing in the street. Do not risk injuring or killing yourself because there was no socially acceptable toilet nearby – celebrate your animal nature by watering the phaltscape with your golden showers, today.

  場黑麥 ioanni elymucampus fecit