haiku 31 Oct 2018

Each breath is precious
Each smile is legendary

Why sweat the small stuff?

americanifesto / 場黑麥 / jpr / urbanartopia / whorphan ]

hydration matters

Oh, the importance of hydration – it cannot be understated! Whether bicycling, gardening, shredding, meditating, or bolting from the cops, the healthy and happy individual knows to hydrate well, and often. In cases of extreme sweating – such as when the clothes are soaked with the body's own moisture or when one is engaged in a prolonged physical activity – the body should be re-hydrated aggressively, and without delay.

Electrolyte tablets work well in such instances, supplying at a cost of roughly 50-cents-each such minerals and complex carbohydrates that the body tends to lose when sweating. It pays to spend a half-dollar on these easily-portable pills that maintain a balanced body-chemistry; dehydrated persons are more irritable than their hydrated counterparts, they tire more quickly, they quit tasks more readily, and they bitch and moan, bumming everyone else out. Less accurate hydration methods – such as making a nice salt or sugar lick in the cup of one's hand – when coupled with the ingestion of a few cups of cool, clear water, will effect hydration, but often at the risk of over-consumption of tasty mounds of unwashed, raw cane sugar, which can lead to weight-gain.

The supreme wet, that one drink which trumps all others, is the fluid of the green coconut. (Please drink only 100% pure green coconut milk, since anything less will be contaminated with refined sugars and plain water.) The primary drawback to green coconut milk is its decreased portability compared to the electrolyte tablet, the second being the relatively high cost of marketing and transporting it to persons living outside of the topics, its natural habitat. Overall, however, this fluid is truly a nectar of the gods, a supreme ally in one's struggle for personal greatness and physical fitness. If neither the electrolyte tablet nor green coconut water is available, hydrate with plain H2O until such time as the piss runs light-yellow or clear, and eat a balanced meal of vegetables, some form of pasta or rice, and protein such as that found in sardines. Dehydration is a serious condition that affects both the mind and the body in serious and debilitating ways, so learn to read your body's warning signs, moistening it regularly.

場黑麥 mentiri manufactorem fecit

on phaltweariness - the automobile

  Today's city streets are pitted and rough as if mauled by large and powerful beasts, and the souls of the people who drive upon are similarly abused. Aggression and impatience descend without fail upon the poor buggers who drive upon today's maligned avenues.

  We the Smog Riders of the America Phaltscape (the asphalt landscape) look often with pity upon our neighbors of the road, they who spend long hours strapped tightly to chairs which are in turn bolted to the floors of a tiny metal boxes. After spending years in such torturous environments, they will have forgotten the satisfaction of moving their own bodies through space/time using nothing other than living muscle and some metal tubes bolted to a pair of pneumatic tires. Rather than the good sweat that stands upon the skin of the bicyclist after a healthy cross-town slog, the sweat of the car driver will be distressed and foul, an oozing sheen that tends to creep through his furrowed brow as he worries about the skyrocketing price of petroleum.

  The smog riding street-art vagabond knows as well to avoid paying for petrol as she does to remain always vigilant of the withering and debilitating affects of phaltweariness – it is her duty to preserve the chaotic super-abundance of Street Art, and to record for Posterity as much of it as she can. To fulfill this task, and to keep her feet on the pedals, she has learned the limits of her body's tolerance for dehydration, pain, and exhaustion, and she knows how to make herself well again.

  Given the phaltweariness, the stressed out drivers, and the miles spend cycling through the phaltscape, how does the vagabond capture every unique work of street art that is at risk of being torn down as soon as it goes up? She does not. But she does what she can do, photographing what pictures might cross her path with the road grit foulding her mouth and a song filling her heart.

  Spes Mea In Ratio Est - 場黑麥 John Paul Roggenkamp