on seeking trouble

During the course of one's life, one is likely to be looked at by other people. We look at each other for different reasons, among them to appraise or mock each other's clothing; to justify and reinforce prejudice and racial misconception; to see who is checking out our daring new hairstyle; and, sometimes, simply because we tire of looking at the same spot all the time. It is the author's experience that young men as well as insecure individuals of all sexes are prone to look about in order to find trouble, and that young males in particular will justify aggressive and violent behavior by claiming that their victim had been looking at them in what they found to be an unpleasant or disagreeable manner. An insecure person will tend to internalize even passing or accidental gazes and use them to reinforce a poor self-image and feelings of negative self-worth.

The only method by which one can determine if someone else is looking is by making eye contact with that person. Concurrently, the easiest way to avoid confrontation, heartbreak, self-torment, and sadness is to make eye contact only when absolutely necessary, such as when conversing with waiters, siblings, doctors, or friends. In the course of his observations, the author has discovered that looking at people out of the corner of his eye and thereby avoiding mutual eye contact obviates the need for uncomfortable situations in which someone tries to figure out (by means of examining his immediate surroundings or perhaps checking his teeth for food particles) why someone else was looking in his direction. The author has found that people appreciate being looked at, initially; after a first, cursory glance, however, they tend to become agitated and annoyed if stared or looked at for too often. (This is the primary cause of one worthless whorphan's ongoing, self-imposed sexual drought – his propensity to make eye contact with attractive young females but then failing utterly at all subsequent stages of the relationship.) At this point, the reader is likely thinking, 'By using a mirrored surface to see if someone is trying to make eye contact, I could avoid making eye contact, if I wanted to. Why hasn't the author mentioned that? What an idiot.' The author admits that he has indeed thought of and experimented with mirrors. In his opinion, though, trying to find and use a reflective surface in the crowded environment of, say, a subway car, poses its own unique challenges, challenges that can be avoided by simply not looking anyone in the face and choosing rather to lead a life of quietly miserable solitude. (Furthermore, the human mind recognizes the eye better than it does most other shapes; if it finds that it is being looked at, it will alert its host to danger and not rest until it has discovered the cause of its distress.)

The author reminds the reader of the importance of keeping track of where people are, what they have in their hands, and what they are looking at; he urges the reader to do this sneakily, out of the corners of the eye; he repeats the age-old mantra: “True friends stab in the front” (Oscar Wilde). Experience has shown that if someone is looked at one time but not a second, that person will mind his or her own business as if first contact had never occurred, demanding neither satisfaction nor a second date. Making eye contact with the wrong person can lead to other kinds of contact, including those of the verbal and the fist-based variety, so please remember to do your own time content in knowledge that each one of us lives and dies alone. Mahalo.

mentiri factorem fecit © 場黑麥

mirrors – mirrors everywhere

Look around you. That's right, take a good look around you. Unless you are visually-impaired or you lead a rugged, comfort-less existence out in the woods somewhere, then, while just looking around, you probably looked at a mirrored surface, something in which you perhaps saw a reflection of yourself having a look around. Many things with which we surround ourselves these days are high-gloss, shiny, or mirrored, including our laptops, automobiles, mobile phones, tablet computers, windows, watch-faces, doors, door-handles, hubcaps, handlebars, plates, pots, utensils, and eyeglasses, to name but a few. Oh the many mirrors one can gaze longingly into, losing oneself in the strangely hypnotic activity of making eye-contact with oneself. So is its profusion, and such is its commonality, that we modern persons can hardly imagine life without the mirror.

Consider, however, that just a few thousand years ago the primary reflective material was a calm surface of water, which only reflects well under optimal conditions and which requires one to lean or suspend oneself over said water to the point that objects start falling from pockets and fluids start dripping from the face. The ancients, it appears, understood the dangers of self-observation, telling a cautionary tale about a young man named Narcissus who so loved looking at his own reflection that he dove into a pond after it, where he was promptly ensnared and drowned by pond-nymphs, who had been lying in wait. (Similar to other old stories, I believe that the tale of Narcissus is meant to be taken as a warning of the dangers of emulating his foolish ways and getting caught in the tractor-beam of one's own reflection.) It wasn't until the Industrial Revolution that many people could afford mirrors or, for that matter, glass; before the 18th century, the only persons who could afford mirrors were fantastically rich individuals so corrupt and so cruel that one wishes they'd have stared at their own reflections more often instead of eradicating villages and enslaving and torturing their own subjects. (I believe that the myth about seven years of bad luck resulting from a broken mirror dates to before the Industrial Revolution, when hand-portable reflective objects were prohibitively expensive.)

So, today, are we better off having all these mirrors everywhere, or can mirrors be blamed in part for our rational-selfishness (i.e. avarice), that wasteful, ego-centric, quasi-capitalistic economic system that drains our lives of intrinsic value and imprisons our hearts in shells of self-serving egotism, rendering us incapable of respecting ourselves, each other, and Nature? I find it logical to assume that staring constantly at one's own reflection reinforces the notion that we must first look out for ourselves, for number one, before sacrificing our precious time or hard-won greenbacks on others. Since thinking about these questions, I have tried to look into mirrors only when necessary, such as when shaving my face or checking for ticks, avoiding even looking at my own reflection when typing; when I do stop to look, I am often shocked to see the image which I have come to associate with myself staring back at me, an image which correspond but poorly to the ebullient spirit that burns deep within my loins. Which, I think, is the crux of the matter: mirrors disassociate one from one's tender humanity, from one's intrinsic goodness, fueling one's ego and facilitating the ego's hijacking of the soul, which results in greedy, self-righteous, and short-sighted behavior such as conspicuous consumption and self-banishment into wage-slavery. Therefore, dear friends, avoid a mirror today, and rescue the soul from the ego's sticky clutches. Mahalo.

場黑麥 mentiri factorem fecit