on falling short

This past Thor's day, I watched a North Korean propaganda video (see here.) Similar to other videos leaked from behind the bamboo curtain, this one was crudely cut together from pirated media; it featured a man explaining the ills of capitalism (his face was blurred out) and the methods by which our Western society keeps us numbed and tuned out to the world around us. I consider myself to be a forward-thinking individual who works hard to counter the incessant lure of materialism, who educates himself through non-US news sources (such as RT.com and AlAribiya.com), who does more than most other people he knows to eat well and avoid processed foods, and who does his part to combat terrorism and protect our natural environment by not driving a car but rather moving himself around on a bicycle. The video referenced above, however – even though it was a low-budget hodgepodge originating in a place the government of the United States says we must fear and mistrust, it made a lot of sense to me; upon watching it, I knew that in my efforts I was falling short, that I was just as much a puppet of this country's capitalistic overlords as my fellow Americans who engage in constant and shameless consumerism. This knowledge waned until I started trolling on tumblr, mesmerized by image upon image of tanned and buxom beauties, whereupon it returned full-force. I sat there in shame, looked upon the shamefulness of my ways, vowed to do better, performed a Death Meditation, and started the healing process anew. Aho.

mentiri factorem fecit – 場黑麥