For a handful of days now I have been taking a break from my normal yoga routine. This break is due in part to a patch of swollen and bruised flesh that halfway through last week blossomed just below the knee on the outside of my right leg. I suspect that I sustained the injury a couple of weeks ago when I crashed twice while bicycling down an icy alley on my way to teach yoga, although it could also be old energies bubbling to the surface that were released during one of my periods of meditation. I am loathe to take this break because on some level I am convinced I shall not ever start back up again my standard 5 day-a-week, 2-hour-long yoga practice, even though I really want to do so. On another level, I know that once I can kneel comfortably again I shall dive right back into my regular practice. It is a massive win for me to have developed emotionally to the point of being able and willing to feel and probe at the different urges raging inside of me and being able to take a break from my efforts without giving up on them completely; I credit my development in these matters to the Forrest Yoga Foundation Teacher Training, to the Embodying Enoughness series of yoga classes taught by Turbodog Yoga Chicago, and to the courage I have learned and support I have received from parents and siblings and friends; two years ago I would have at this point backslid into substance abuse and wallowed for 6 months in a state of regret-tinged depression. The curtains are lifting, the demons they flee, they will soon return but that's OK with me. Praise be to the sages who don't live and do, we honor your teachings we walk proud and true. Aho.
© americanifesto / 場黑麥
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